Judas Iscariot wanted out.  It’s unclear why.  But he did.  It must have been building over time.  Like the discord that gradually grows between a disconnected wife to her husband, so that one day she says, “I want out.”

I think it boils down to this.  Judas no longer saw Jesus as a bargain.  It got too costly to follow him.  Again, this probably had been growing over time.  Some of the things Jesus did and said and the people he was keeping company seemed to be going in a different direction than he was comfortable with.  I wonder if it culminated in the prostitute interrupting their supper to anoint Jesus’ head and feat with perfume and tears.  How brazen!  How disruptive!  He couldn’t hold back and scolded her for wasting her money on Jesus when it could have gone to feed the poor.  Looking back we can see how disingenuous his statement was.

No, following Jesus got too costly and he wanted out.  More specifically, he wanted to cash out.  “If I’m going to part ways with Jesus, I might as well make a little extra money.  (I’m assuming he was going to donate it to charity!)  Thirty pieces of silver for handing Jesus over?  Not what I was expecting, but it’ll do.”

As I’ve reflected on Judas’ sad story, I’m less quick to judge and more apt to sympathize.  Following Jesus isn’t a bargain.  It is costly, because he does call me to deny myself, take up my cross daily and follow him.  There are plenty of times (more numerous than I’d like to admit) that I choose to do my own thing, or I choose to do his thing my own way.  No, I’m not physically selling Jesus out, but I am spiritually.

It’s Holy Week.  This was a bad week for Judas Iscariot.  Turns out it was his last week.  Not only was following Jesus no longer a bargain, but his life stopped being a bargain as well.  After he realized what he had done, he realized it was too costly to go on.  The price was too high to face Jesus again, and so he took the “cheap” way out.

I don’t know about Judas Iscariot.  I’d like to think if he had stuck around, Jesus would have looked to lovingly confront him and restore him, like he did Peter.  Perhaps he would have been one of the great church leaders like Peter.  But he didn’t.

As you consider your own life in light of Holy Week, particularly with Good Friday and Easter Sunday, may you embrace the high cost that Jesus paid to make you His own.  May you know that the price he paid, was “a bargain” to make you his own.  He would do it again if he needed to, but praise God, He doesn’t.

Happy Easter!